Trying to Take Chances

       There is always the fear of the unknown. A fear that just haunts people and makes people doubt themselves. This fear has also been s feat in my life because for so long, I have been depriving myself of alot of possibilities that I could have benefitted from. It then came to me that life is better risky than safe. It doesn't sound very appealing but it has made me learn a lot of things that I do not regret(well, sometimes I do but not regularly). One of the greatest decisions in my life was to look past the judgement of other people and doing what I liked doing. Like my taekwondo, which I never really had an interest in because there's no way the fat kid could excel in a contact sport wherein speed and power was crucial but I took a dive in and tried it out anyway. Honestly, I learned more there than I have ever learned in school. Not in the knowledge part, but in the discipline and mental game and even confidence. It was so much fun and educational and you get a good exercise out of it. I also met most of my bestfriends there. I got to be myself there with no inhibitions and no walls(even if that took a ton of tears to do), and I made it and it's really one of the best things in life. One chance I took that changed my life blissfully drastic. But of course, I also have my regrets that I cringe to everytime I think about the chances I decided not to take.  The biggest being shying away from the limelight even if I know what I'm capable of. I like to sing and people say they like my voice but when I was given a chance to perform solo and share my talent, I just bolted and did not show myself to the people. I regret it now because now that I am more comfortable in my own skin, I am not given a chance to solo again because they do not want a repeat of the last time. But I know it is my fault and I will try my best to be a little bit more open to possibilities and take those chances because in the end, it'll be worth it. So um.... I Love You Carrot! Always have and always will(sad but true cause you prolly don't even ever think about me.)  I just had to take the chance to say how I feel and not cower in fear because he's really special(to me) even if he doesn't know it. I love your pretty brown eyes and your tall scrawny frame. Your kindness makes my heart sing and I hope we cross paths again and in that time, I'll just be waiting for a chance of loving once more or letting go of this past love. #sicklysweet #eeeww